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Showing posts from June, 2007

To me, Old Age is always Fifteen Years older than I am.

THE other day a young person asked me how I felt about being old. I was taken aback, for I do not think of myself as old. Upon seeing my reaction, she was immediately embarrassed, but I explained that it was an interesting question, and I would ponder it, and let her know. Old Age, I decided, is a gift. I am now, probably for the first time in my life, the person I have always wanted to be. Oh, not my body! I sometime despair over my body, the wrinkles, the baggy eyes, and the sagging butt. And often I am taken aback by that old Geezer that lives in my mirror (who looks like my grandfather), but I don't agonize over those things for long. I would never trade my amazing friends, my wonderful life, my loving family for less gray hair or a flatter belly. As I've aged, I've become more kind to myself, and less critical of myself. I've become my own friend. I don't chide myself for eating that extra cake or cookie, or for not making my bed, or for buying th...

Just an ordinary day

ITS still raining! Yet the talk four weeks ago was all about water restrictions the never ending drought, desalination plants and larger storage reservoirs. Our dams were down to an average of 18% above the draw off level and now the drought has come back to bite us with storm damage floods power cuts and dams at a 52% level. Yesterday we had sunshine and a break of 28 hours without rain, during the day I washed the car and rinsed it with seven pails of water, (We are not permitted to wash our cars with a hose)But during the time it took to fill 4 pails of water I could have easily hosed the car off. Ford falcon KGV000 is ten years old; its 4 litre heart is still beating well; thanks to (Mobil 1 the best and most expensive non fossil oil). Also both interior and exterior are looking remarkably well for its 133,000 klms or 83,000 miles, its only problem is that it guzzles fuel like a hog at a trough. later I went out to have a new pair of trousers altered, at the one lady alteration sho...

SHREK the Ugly Green Ogre, Is turning our kids into Lazy Greaseballs.

SHREK is top of the hit list for a group of health-conscious parents who say the animated character is encouraging children to pester for junk food. Consumer advocate group The Parents Jury believes the number of unhealthy food products adopting the green ogre as a marketing tool was "out of control". After sifting through nominations for poor food marketing campaigns from the 2700-strong Parents Jury membership, the group's trial by jury panel found food products linked with Shrek the Third were the worst example of junk food marketing aimed at children. Do you think Shrek has been fairly targeted? What's your view on other fast food campaigns that target children? "Major supermarkets have jam-packed their shelves with Shrek-branded food products, including sugary cereals, chocolate, lollies, chocolate spread and sweet desserts," "In some stores big green footprints even guide a path from the front doors to a section of the store dedicated entirely to...

Your Free Three Minute Management Course.

------------------------------------------------------------------ THREE MINUTE MANAGEMENT COURSE- Lesson 1 A man is getting into the shower just as his wife is finishing up her shower, when the doorbell rings. The wife quickly wraps herself in a towel and runs downstairs. When she opens the door there stands Bob, the next door neighbor. Before she says a word, Bob says, "I'll give you $800 to drop that towel." After thinking for a moment, the woman drops her towel and stands naked in front of Bob. After a few seconds, Bob hands her $800 and leaves. The woman wraps back up in the towel and goes back upstairs. When she gets to the bathroom, her husband asks "Who was that?" "It was Bob the next door neighbor" she replies. "Great!" the husband says, "Did he say anything about the $800 he owes me?" Moral of the story: If you share critical information pertaining to credit and risk with your shareholders in time, you may be in a position...

What the Church and the Faith Industry doesn't want you to Know.

WHAT the Church doesn't want you to know It has often been emphasised that Christianity is unlike any other religion, for it stands or falls by certain events which are alleged to have occurred during a short period of time some 20 centuries ago. Those stories are presented in the New Testament, and as new evidence is revealed it will become clear that they do not represent historical realities. The Church agrees, saying: "Our documentary sources of knowledge about the origins of Christianity and its earliest development are chiefly the New Testament Scriptures, the authenticity of which we must, to a great extent, take for granted." (Catholic Encyclopedia, Farley ed., vol. iii, p. 712) The Church makes extraordinary admissions about its New Testament. For example, when discussing the origin of those writings, "the most distinguished body of academic opinion ever assembled" (Catholic Encyclopedias, Preface) admits that the Gospels "do not go back to the fir...

It is Time to stop Procrastinating, Affairs to be put in order.

Although my departure date has yet to be decided by the elements which motivate the workings of my fast deteriorating being, I am still not in too much of a hurry to go. Most financial workings have been resolved, but the mortal remains thingy, like whether I should provide sustenance for the flora of the Cremmo gardens, in the form of a blood and bone calcium supplement; has been shelved. Seventy per cent of our States departures end up in the cauldron of fire, Why? because its cheaper and easier to maintain, and harder to resurrect should there be a second coming. So, It has been decided that a more conventional resting place will be in order, A double plot in the local boot hill with headstones, ones that will remain readable for the extended family to discover, that I spent it all before I left. The past few weeks have been less than normal, what with floods rain winds and seemingly never ending power cuts, trying to maintain the domestic scenario has been a pain in the ass, flas...

Teachers Common Room Capers under scrutiny, 'Staying behind for a Naughty makes you a porno star'.

HIGH school teachers have complained they are being secretly filmed by students in the classroom and the videos posted on the internet. In a sinister development involving mobile phone cameras, videos taken by students during classes are appearing on the MySpace and YouTube sites. Teachers are angry the technology is being used to capture them in compromising situations or hold them up to ridicule. Students across the state have been warned they face disciplinary action if they improperly film school staff or each other. They could also be prosecuted under the Listening Devices Act for posting videos on the internet. Many members were concerned about "video and sound recordings of teachers". "Sometimes students will film for a joke or to hold a teacher up to ridicule," "They put the video on YouTube or My Space . . . this type of thing is going to grow. The cameras used are so small that people don't know they are there." Worried teachers have been tol...

Counselling Malarky Abolished, Its far better to " Have A Good Cry Instead".

June 21, 2007 12:00am TRAIN disasters, floods, and now the Melbourne shooting - ghastly traumas dominate our news. Behind the scenes a small army of counsellors is making a living from the emotional fall-out. When Victorian police emerged from the grisly task of sorting through the mangled Kerang train wreck they were immediately whisked away for trauma debriefing, to prevent any lasting effects on their psychological health. At least that's what the counselling was supposed to do. But it doesn't work. This type of trauma debriefing – or critical incident stress debriefing – is now discredited. The Australian Centre for Post-traumatic Mental Health (ACPMH) has just released new guidelines on post-traumatic mental health – which have been given the tick of approval by the National Health and Medical Research Council. The first of these guidelines spells out that psychological debriefing should not be offered on a routine basis. That's a mighty blow for the large numbers of d...

"Vest Remembers" Typhoon 'WANDA' Hong Kong, 1962.

Typhoon Wanda Typhoon Wanda struck at about eight o’clock am, Saturday, 1 September 1962, its epicentre travelled over the colony. It is recorded as the most severe storm that Hong Kong has experienced in the past forty-two years. We secured our second-storey flat with battens and carpets over the windows and doors, and then waited. The rain and wind were unbelievable – about twelve inches of rain in twenty-four hours with winds exceeding 100 mph, the piston of the anemometer at the observatory stopped at wind speed 130 kilometres per hour, an accurate reading was not possible. Eight year old Christopher and six year old George our sons bravely baled out the lounge room floor which had become flooded from the rainwater pouring in, while I crawled outside the flat with a rope tied to my body and unblocked the balcony drains. The woman next door came into our flat screaming because her flat had been smashed. She hadn’t been prepared and had lost everything. In the general chaos, cars wer...

What does Love Really mean.

Slow down for three minutes to read this. It is so worth it. Touching words from the mouth of babes. What does Love mean? A group of professional people posed this question to a group of 4 to 8 year-olds, "What does love mean?" The answers they got were broader and deeper than anyone could have imagined. See what you think: "When my grandmother got arthritis, she couldn't bend over and paint her toenails anymore. So my grandfather does it for her all the time, even when his hands got arthritis too. That's love." Rebecca- age 8 When someone loves you, the way they say your name is different. You just know that your name is safe in their mouth." Billy - age 4 (I love this one) Love is when a girl puts on perfume and a boy puts on shaving cologne and they go out and smell each other." Karl - age 5 "Love is when you go out to eat and give somebody most of your French fries without making them give you any of theirs." Chrissy - age 6 "Lov...

Origins of The English Language in Less Than 800 Words.

DO You Know What You`re Writing?: Origins of The English Language in 800 Words For as long as I can remember (which, admittedly, isn`t that long) I have been interested in words and language. As a writer it`s important to understand (at least in part) where the words come from. English is a fascinating language, Its words are rich in both history and cultural content. But how did these words, this language, come to be? What are these scrawlings writers write? In this article we`re going to take a look at a little history and a few entertaining resources too! I`ve kept it as short as I could, and though it did tempt me to become a 5000-word essay Isteadfastly resisted ;) 1. Old English No, not those in the twilight of their lives. This is the name given to the dialects spoken in England up until about AD 1100. Where did it all begin? Well, I`m not going back all the way. We`ll start, for our purposes, during the 5th-6th Century AD. Three tribes speaking the Western Germanic langu...

Vest is undergoing interrogation by blogging thought police

How well do you know me? Monday June 11th 2007, 6:06 am Filed under: MeMe I stole this from Lil Bit, A Five*****Star X (who between you and me is a Lil Hottie!). I thought it was interesting. You are supposed to answer the questions about me. Even if you don’t know the answers, have a guess… Go on, give it a go. Summarize me in three words:Where did we meet: Take a stab at my middle name: How long have you known me: When is the last time that we saw each other: Do I drink: Am I happy: Am I a good person: What was your first impression of upon meeting/seeing me: What’s one of my favorite things to do: Am I funny: How do you make me smile: What’s my favorite type of music: Have you ever seen me cry: Can I sing?: What is the best feature about me: Am I shy or outgoing: Am I a rebel or do I follow the rules: Do I have any special talents: Would you call me preppy, average, sporty, punk, hippie, glam, nerdy, snobby, or something else (what): What is my favorite food: If there was one good n...

We have Sunshine, but for how long? flooding continues . More dark skies..

FROM my balcony to the East the dark clouds are gathering for a further assault so it appears. I am hoping the rain clouds will deposit their rain on the parched areas of the interior , although not as bad prior to the rain, they are able to absorb more than we can; here on the Central Coast of New South Wales Australia. The central coast is a disaster area; over 100,000 homes without power and other normal day to day necessities. News around the globe may have reached you, if not Google www.news.com.au/dailytelegraph this will save time and unnecessary explanation. On the personal front, I wrote my last post on Friday evening, it had been raining fairly hard most of the previous days but now it had whipped up into a frenzy and absolutely bucketing down. the cold S/E winds coming in off shore sent us all off to bed early and finally some sleep after listening to to the noise outside. I woke about 5-30 am, darkness and no power. At daylight we all had hot drinks made from the BBQ side b...

Drought ! What Drought !..Its Pissing down here in NSW Oz

Well we wanted rain and plenty of it and at last we are getting it. We have had unrelenting rain for the past two days here where I live in the seaside town of Budgewoi NSW Australia. Our garden is under water and the garage floor too, the road is now a flowing stream. for hours we have heard the constant thunder; so the rain gods are intent on keeping it coming. The tourists will stay away from this the 'Queens birthday long weekend, when lilibet will be 81 years and 51 days old. Elsewhere in Australia other states too are getting high rainfall where drought conditions have prevailed for several years. rivers dry for twenty years or more are now flowing again, and soon the grass Will be green again. In recent years the people in the state of New South Wales and probably other states have been encouraged to install rainwater tanks to conserve the tap water supply,the rain water together with grey water from the washing machines is the used for such purposes as car and boat washing ...

To some readers its just Gobbledygook.

I find every day when visiting other blogsites there are people out there who use inordinate measures to unnecessarily incorporate uncommon words and phrases in order to compile an otherwise simple message, these are people who consider that an obscure, or Greek or a latin word adds weight to their statement, when in fact it does the opposite and repels readers and listeners who are only at ease with that which is normally easy to understand. A person need not know Latin, but should at least have forgotten it. VEST, Daily Gaggle.

South African workers have no energy for SEX....Vest Say's "The Aussie Viagra Oysters would solve their problem".

/05/2007 07:32 AM No Energy for Sex Say Striking Workers South African workers have complained to their union, COSATU, that working conditions are so tough that energy for sex is minimal or non-existent. Regional Chairman Monroe Mkalipi, has taken up the cause and complained, in an effort to negotiate with the government over pay and other conditions including performance in the bedroom. There has not been a pay rise awarded to the workers since 2004. "The harshness that we have in our workplace is so severe to such a point that when you get home at night it becomes a problem expanding our families," Mkalipi stated in an interview. Vest has stated that "Those Aussie Oysters laced with Viagra(see back post) will soon bring their flagging members standing to attention".

Another NESSY Sighting

06/01/2007 02:03 AM Scientist May Have Caught the Loch Ness Monster on Video Gordon Holmes, an amateur scientist from the UK, has captured what may be the Loch Ness Monster on video. The footage shows a 15m black creature swimming at about 10km/h. The legend brings 400,000 tourists to the loch anually. The footage will be subjected to further scrutiny but even the normally sceptical Scottish media is running the footage. Stories of a monster in the loch go back as far as 565 AD and there have been over 4000 modern reports of sightings. "I see myself as a sceptical interpreter of what happens in the loch, but I do keep an open mind about these things and there is no doubt this is some of the best footage I have seen," said marine biologist Adrian Shine.

Vest Remembers Sydney Australia Tues June 5 1945

According to my ancient illegally kept WW2 journal, the 38,000 ton British Battleship The HMS King George V arrived in Sydney on Tuesday June 5 1945(same calendar year as 07)& berthed at No 6 Wooloomooloo for a three week rest from the operation 'Iceberg' conflict near Japan, plus repairs and replenishment and rest &recreation for our crew, I had served nearly two years of wartime activity on the HMS King George V up and until then and I was not yet 19 years old, but I was thankful to be alive. Vest Daily Gaggle.

Living for Friday and that Long Weekend, the Queen Bless her and all who sail in her

IT seems that Australia and our close British Commowealth neighbour New Zealand may be leading the field when it comes to having a day off for some archaic reason. These are what are referred to as public holidays. The people who take advantage of having a bludge from their workplace and being paid for doing so, more than likely none of these people have little idea about the significance or the reason for the public holiday and even if they do rarely show any degree of interest. Australia has nine National public holidays, New years Day, Australia Day, Good Friday, Easter Saturday, Easter Monday, Anzac Day, Queens Birthday, Christmas day, Boxing Day. Australia's seven States and the Capital territory collectively; have a further sixteen public holidays, notably 'Labour Day' is one celebrated? in six states on five differing dates. The worst culprit of all is the 'Two headed' State of Tasmania which has eight more lazy days than the national figure, five point...

Education Dept condones the possibility of US-style School Massacre

A SCHOOL near Goulburn is refusing to take back two 16-year-old boys who are alleged to have plotted a US-style classroom massacre over the Internet. The Department of Education last week issued a directiveto Crookwell High School, northwest of Goulburn, to allow the two Year 11 boys to return tomorrow. But the demand has triggered a brawl between departmental officers and teachers, who say the two boys pose a danger to both themselves and other students. Teachers meanwhile held an urgent meeting last week during which they voted to take industrial action if the department refused to reverse its decision. Crookwell High School, situated in the southern tablelands, has just 292 students. The two boys were removed from the school by police last month after concerns they were plotting to kill classmates. The boys, both aged 16, had allegedly discussed plans on an Internet chat site to shoot fellow students and school staff in a Columbine-style massacre. School staff were alerted to the pl...

Horny Aphrodisiac Oysters a Hard sell, say's drug company.

A NSW oyster farmer has been feeding his crop Viagra to make the ultimate aphrodisiac - but now the drug's maker is threatening to take him to court. George May began lacing his oysters with the anti-impotence drug in a bid to sell them to overseas customers. Marketing them as Viagra Oysters, he says the process not only boosts the aphrodisiac qualities of the shellfish but there is also a potential Asian market of up to $300 million. The unusual additive has, however, landed the farmer in hot water with pharmaceutical company Phizer and state food authorities. Food Safety NSW says Mr May's conduct is illegal and breaches the NSW shellfish program under the food act. Pfizer has also threatened to take legal action because Viagra Oysters is a trademark violation. Mr May, who has patented the process, is adamant he will continue harvesting the oysters and transferring them to tanks full of crushed Viagra because there is an overseas market. "We realise we will not be able to...

At last 'A Sensible Shooting,' Music Lovers will love this.

MANILA: An unemployed man was shot dead by a security guard for singing out of tune in a Philippine karaoke bar. Romy Baligula, 29, was halfway through Frank Sinatra's 'My Way' when 43-year-old security guard Robilito Ortega yelled that he was out of tune, before pulling out his gun and shooting him dead. I wonder how many time's myself and other's have pointed their hands Gun fashion at these singers in utter despair. I think that guy asked for it somehow. However, a Stun gun or a Paint gun would have sufficed.

The MALE version of Pub-Club and Public Toilet tendencies. You only flick it once or you'r Wanking.

Having read the previous sad tale relating to the female toilet bungling, I thought it to be only right and fair that the peculiarities of the Male rest room be unfolded to the ears of our Female readers, I will focus mainly on what I have perceived and not the here say of others. Male toilets usually resume the same filthy state they were in an hour after the cleaners have gone. Hand drying paper litters the floor, fag ends in the pee trough mixed with the vomit of drunks and wash basins coated with miscellaneous crap. My biggest gripe is with whom I call the 'Shy Boys', who regardless of whether anyone is within the the rest room or not; these thoughtless dickheads, needlessly use the Cubicles with 'Sit Down toilets', OK, its alright to use them for the purpose they were intended for 'The big job' or to sit down if you are blind or maybe if your wee willy winkle is embarrassingly small, but piddling all over the seats is totally selfish, sadly few complain unt...