The Daily Gaggle

NO offence, but I decline your kind invitation to join Facebook. I've been "poked'' (relax, it's Facebook speak) six times in the past fortnight - sent an email invitation to be someone's "friend'' (Facebook speak again) - and while I admit to feeling warmly wanted and kind of popular, it's just that I'm yet to see the point. I have an email address that seems to work just fine. I also have a mobile phone. And anyone who doesn't have access to these two vital connection portals, well it's probably for good reason. To further throw open the lines of accessibility would surely mean having to filter unwanted and unwarranted attention and, frankly, who has the time? I say all that, but it doesn't mean I don't fear social exclusion, cutting myself off to the movement of the times akin to not reading The Da Vinci Code or Harry Potter. (Confession: I've read neither. But then if I was on Facebook, that'd be common knowledge...

ALIVE but - Useless old Grandmother sent to the Garbage Dump. MUMBAI (BOMBAY) INDIA: A sick 75 year old Indian grandmother thrown into the garbage by her relatives has died. Chinnammel Palaniappan was rescued from the garbage dump in Erode town,400Km from Chennnai(Lahore)capital of southern Tamil Nadu state last week. Police said she told her rescuers that, she had been taken from her home after her daughter had told her grandsons to dump her far away, so that she could not find her way back. Before she died she told rescuers she woke up and found herself amongst a heap of rotting garbage. OTTAWA: A Canadian man has found the remains of an infant Wrapped in news print dated September 12 1925 and stashed in the walls of an old house now under renovation. You always hope to find something in walls - coins - antiques but never a baby, renovator Bob Kinghorn said. He was about to drill a hole through a ceiling joist when he found a bundle of newspaper he first believed was Insulation. ...

A CROCODILE hunter has challenged the Irwin family to a public debate about the predators, accusing them of "not knowing what they are talking about". Mick Pitman, a crocodile products industry consultant and taxidermist, and his business partner Michaela Johnston today criticised a north Queensland crocodile research centre to be built in memory of the late Steve Irwin. Australia Zoo has said the reserve would protect a spectrum of wildlife species, including crocodiles. However, Mr Pitman, known as "Crocodile Mick", today said the Irwins' latest venture would financially hurt the commercial crocodile industry. "The Irwins state on their website 'sustainable use' of native wildlife in so-called modern nations like Australia and the USA has inadvertently created a multi-million dollar 'bushmeat' industry, where local people kill native wildlife for meat, skins and products," he said. "Wake up Australians! The Irwins have rode off t...

Today my wife and I were watching 'Parkinson' interview the late Sir John Mills on Foxtell TV, A re run from four years ago. I made a casual remark that I remembered a movie he was in; back in 1935. The Movie had several titles, which I discovered on Google, listed downwards from the more recent it was numbered 117, then there were others down to the number 130 his first movie. The 117 number titles were 1, Brown in the resolution 1935, 'Albert Brown'. 2, AKA, Born for Glory USA. 3, AKA, Forever England, UK re issue title. I had no recollection of The death of Sir John Mills, although at the time of this interview he was aged 93 years, but there was one indelible thing in my mind and that was he was cast in that movie as a 17 year old British Navy sailor at the age of 27. This Movie is without doubt the most remembered movie I can recall, it is mentioned as such in my Pseudo Memoirs, a Novel by J L Spencer,'Waving Goodbye to a Thousand Flies'. Quite a few o...

The previous fortnight has been intensely busy with family & friends and it continues with a reunion of ancient mariners tomorrow and visiting Gr/ Children Friday, which leaves little time for visiting my dear friends around the world, and no time for those who are less friendly. So; see you all later. Here are 12 (unintentional) double-entendres aired on British TV and radio. >>1. Pat Glenn, weight lifting commentator - "And this is Gregoriava from Bulgaria . I saw her snatch this morning and it was amazing!" >> >>2. New Zealand Rugby Commentator - "Andrew Mehrtens loves it when Daryl Gibson comes inside of him." >> >>3. Ted Walsh - Horse Racing Commentator - "This is really a lovely horse. I once rode her mother." >> >>4. Harry Carpenter at the Oxford-Cambridge boat race 1977 - "Ah, isn't that nice. The wife of the Cambridge President is kissing the Cox of the Oxford crew." >> >>5. U...

Yes it is true. The first test of the bomb was in New Mexico Monday 16-7-1945. Apollo 11 took off for the moon landing 9pm Bst 16-7-1969. The Muslim calendar commenced 16-7-622, Wot a shame. Thank you all for your Birthday greeting E mails and the birthday comments on the previous posts.

SEND BIRTHDAY WISHES TO THIS NICE OLD GUY WHO LIVES IN MUMBAI INDIA, VIA E mail to sabydasouza@yahoo.com Thank you. He deserves recognition, as he really must have been good to get to the ripe old age of 100 years. Happy Birthday, DIOGO LEWIS FERNANDES.

Subject: Detainees... Detainees... A lady libertarian wrote a lot of letters to the government, complaining about the treatment of a captive insurgent (terrorist) being held in Afghanistan National Correctional System facilities. She received back the following reply: National Defence Headquarters MGen George R. Pearkes Bldg, 15 NT 101 Colonel By Drive Ottawa, ON K1A 0K2 Canada Dear Concerned Citizen, Thank you for your recent letter expressing your profound concern of treatment of the Taliban and Al Quaeda terrorists captured by Canadian Forces who were subsequently transferred to the Afghanistan Government and are currently being held by Afghan officials in Afghanistan National Correctional System facilities. Our administration takes these matters seriously and your opinions were heard loud and clear here in Ottawa. You will be pleased to learn, thanks to the concerns of citizens like yourself, we are creating a new department here at the Department of National Defense, to be called ...

This is a Re-run WHAT happened to the slogan 'Kiss a non smoker and taste the difference'? Did the tobacco companies buy the copyright and ban its publication? if so what about having a new slogan! But remember the kids will have to see it too. My partner and I are non smokers and only experience this dreadful problem at alcohol pumped up parties and other social gatherings. What have you experienced when kissing a tobacco smoker? be careful now. What are your thoughts on tobacco usage in general? like ban Smokes, ration them or tax them out of reach of people, or should we wear a non smokers badge which states, "Blow that smoke in my face and you will die you bastard" Remember you dopey smokers, It will reduce your shagging days considerably and each smoke an hour of your life. Maybe smokers should be fitted with smoke stacks!! ADD: My two local social clubs which are in a medium size category, segregate smoking areas, however, the gaming areas are all smoking area...

APES: Why should G R A S P grab the funds of well meaning Ape sympathisers, who are targeting the public in order to support the people who in turn give assistance to the various types of dwindling Ape populations on mother earth. Why not, you might say. Well I think not! with reservations of course. Those kind hearted people presently involved are doing a good job, No doubt about that, but how far from extinction are these Apes, now living in their rapidly diminishing rain forests? could they be relocated to other rain forest areas like in Australia? unlikely, might be the reply from the Oz Immigration Dept, A spokes person ; believed to be a liberal politician stated, "If they tend to be more human than other animals - repeat animals, it would not be long before they claimed social security benefits - like haven't we got enough bone idle apes on the dole already. Would they assimilate into our suburban population and become model citizens? If so, what particular suburb would...

Every year Australians eat around 13 kilograms of fish per person. And if health authorities had their way, we'd be eating even more. But in the face of that increasing demand, the local fishing industry is facing declining stocks and fewer licences, meaning we have to get used to having less home grown fish. Consequently, in recent years, the relatively cheap Vietnamese or Mekong catfish has made huge inroads into our market. Not that most consumers would know. Lax naming laws mean the imported fish is often sold under more familiar, local sounding names. Of particular concern is the fact that some of this fish has been found to contain traces of a suspected carcinogen. The same problems have occurred in and around Sydney Australia and bans were imposed on recreational and commercial fishing over a year ago. yet the govt is allowing this suspect fish to be imported with impunity because of its weak inspection guidelines Australians love their seafood and are being urged to eat mo...

I do hope I am proven wrong, but a bunch of nuts marrying for all the wrong reasons is what I perceive here. SEVEN-tier cakes, 7pm receptions, seven types of flowers - for couples who plan to marry on 07/07/07, that is the number. Wedding celebrants will today experience one of the busiest days in the industry's history, with thousands choosing the special date to exchange vows. In Sydney, the NSW Registry of Births, Deaths and Marriages has extended its opening hours to cope with demand for the date as 24 couples will be married there, the first service at 9am and the last to finish after 8pm. NSW Registry of Births, Deaths and Marriages registrar Greg Curry said the date had caused a "sensation" with couples looking to kick-start their marriages. For Jeff Chen, 25, and 24-year-old Angela Feng, to be married during the registry's all-important 7pm timeslot, the date and time were simply a happy accident. "It's not a special date for us . . . it's coincid...

JUST thinking. As my youngest son drove off to work a few minutes ago I realized he had reached the exact age that I was when I left the British Royal Navy on terminal leave; having completed 24 and a half years of service. Like he is now so was I; one month from reaching forty years of age. However that was forty one years ago and since then my former employer has paid to me a quarter of my former salary equal to ($574,000) in todays terms, but I am fully aware that what I have received was in compensation for sticking my neck out for the benefit of the British public in general, and unfortunately for them being a infrequent survivor of the system, and to them a rarity. In hindsight I would never allow this to happen, but being ill informed and impressionable, I allowed myself to be carried away by the euphoria of the conflict between nations at that time, surviving became all important to me and survive I did, although many others who may have had similar aspirations fell foul o...

UP to 3000 young Muslims in Sydney alone are at risk of becoming radicalised by fundamentalist Islam as community leaders warn that Australia has become a "prime country" for hardliners pushing extremist ideologies. The Australian reports today Howard Government-funded research has also found there are more young Muslims per capita who are vulnerable to the influence of radical Islam in Australia than in any other western country. The revelations came as John Howard warned that Australians needed to remain vigilant about the threat of terrorism. While Australia's security threat level would not be heightened following foiled terrorist attacks in Britain since Friday, the Prime Minister criticised those who sought to play down or dismiss the danger of an attack on home soil. "What is happening in Great Britain is a reminder to all of us that, despite all the talk on occasions from some that the threat of terrorism is exaggerated in our society, it is not, and we must ...

Thought you might like this. MALE VS. FEMALE AT THE ATM MACHINE A new sign in the Bank Lobby reads: "Please note that this Bank is installing new Drive-through ATM machines enabling customers to withdraw cash without leaving their vehicles. Customers using this new facility are requested to use the procedures outlined below when accessing their accounts." "After months of careful research, MALE & FEMALE Procedures have been developed. Please follow the appropriate steps for your gender." MALE PROCEDURE: 1. Drive up to the cash machine. 2. Put down your car window. 3. Insert card into machine and enter PIN. 4. Enter amount of cash required and withdraw. 5. Retrieve card, cash and receipt. 6. Put window up. 7. Drive off. FEMALE PROCEDURE: Unfortunately, most of this part is the Truth.!!!! 1. Drive up to cash machine. 2. Reverse and back up the required amount to align car window with the machine. 3. Set parking brake, put the window down. 4. Find handbag, remov...