The Daily Gaggle

The Bacon Tree Two Mexicans are stuck in the desert after crossing into the United States, wandering aimlessly and starving. They are about to just lie down and await death when all of a sudden Luis says......... "Hey Pepe, do you smell what I smell? Ees bacon, I theenk." "Ees, Luis, eet sure smell like bacon." With renewed hope they struggle up the next sand dune, and there, in the distance, is a tree loaded with bacon. There's raw bacon, there's fried bacon, back bacon, double smoked bacon ... Every imaginable kind of cured pork. "Pepe, Pepe, wees saved! Ees a bacon tree!" "Luis, maybe ees a meerage? Wees in the desert don't forget." "Pepe, since when deed you ever hear of a meerage that smell like bacon... ees no meerage, ees a bacon tree!" And with that, Luis staggers towards the tree. He gets to within 5 meters, Pepe crawling close behind, when sudd...

Not a bad summer up to now , a few hot days but we were able to deal with any excesses in temp with the air con, today quite pleasant 20c in doors and a westerly (cool) about 30 knots out side with rain at times, The grass (weeds)  is or are saying  thank you to the gods for their survival. Plus of course the seeds which I planted recently which were generously donated by a now disgruntled Rello who took exception to a remark he didn't hear but supposedly was said to his over weight  serial dissident partner, oh well,  that will keep the dung flying a little longer, I am unconcerned and am not at a loss by his excommunication of my blog from his website, but I'll bet he will take a squizz now and then, hard to remove old habits and curiosity. My wife and I live on the central Coast of NSW Australia, ours is a semi rural seaside situation about two minutes walk from the water, rello's taking exception to me not wishing to trundle down to the hot sun and sand whe...

Why do you need to be tattooed? most intelligent people will wonder or ask the question.It seems it takes less time to decide upon your tattoo than it does to study your dinner menu. I bet you were not thinking at the time of your new permanent adornment " I Love Sally" on a big rosy heart, that it would be harder to erase  than acquire a divorce blessing from the Pope. So why did you adorn your pristine body with a temporary obsession which will stay for ever more amen. Not all girls are named Sally your new wife Rose will be confronted with this tat each time you hanky panky in the boudoir I believe you must be incredibly silly, drunk, bored  or retarded. or easily led.to become tattooed. Tattoos remind me of the never ending display of graffiti we see in dark alley's and along railway tracks. Tattoos now appear to be covering the bodies of most sports persons and despite their belief it makes them appear more belligerent, I believe it is the need to be notice...

Let us give thanks to our favourite mentor.- god or whatever, that, the wretched Cricket Test match series in Australia has finally ended. The sickening stench of hatred stirred up by the  Biased and  retarded sports journo's one sided attitude rarely gave a fair account of what was really happening. although the England team were slightly underdone, the strayans or the bludgerygalahs were at their hateful best, using a double headed coin to win the toss is  bad sportsmanship, however, the nice English gents caught on eventually; but it was too late to notice the Vaseline to shine the ball in a bowlers eyebrows also chewy on the ball to make it swing. The Bludgers best bowler or 'Chucker' of the ball was an Afghanistan resembling Genghis inky arms. it seems that foreign cricketers  mainly Paki's get swift immigration approval called the ' Kepler Wessels fast track Migrant and Citizenship within ten weeks approval Bludge'. As for the RSL Goon, A Mr Row...

The movie about a mass of flesh called the BLOB - the top ruling fatso is heading towards reality. It is a fact that the world population is becoming FATTER and Fatter. The number of Obese and overweight people in the world almost quadrupled to nearly a billion between 1980 and up to 2009  and considering it is now 2014 it must be worse today. People in developing countries are leading the chase to fatness. It beggars belief that with all the info available regarding weight loss, so called intelligent people continue to gorge themselves, laziness - inactivity smoking and greediness the main problem, although it can be said that a fat obese parent could be the cause of triggering obesity. Diet, alcohol smoking and activity mentioned before are controlling my  household,. my weight remains steady although I am a little overweight our two main meals of equal proportion for each of us contains a high content of vegetables but my wife is losing weight despite the extra no...

  CHAPTER 13 ...Not a heap of difference My First Career On 5 January 1942, I went to Shotley Royal Naval Base for a medical examination, which I passed despite being under the height requirement of five feet. I was four feet ten and a half inches, six stone six lbs (42.3 kg), and fifteen years, five months and twenty days old. I was an undersized, under-aged piece of ‘cannon fodder.’ The school received a twenty-five pound Sterling bounty payment upon my delivery to the Royal Navy. My body was sold for approximately 55p or Aus $1-15 a Kilo or 30 cents US per lb. After a gruelling train journey to Fleetwood (near Liverpool,) I embarked in the early morning on the Isle of Man steam packet, ‘Rushen Castle’. It took four hours to get to Douglas, the capital and main port on the Isle of Man. I hadn't been at sea for four years. Looking piteously at the first-timers vomiting on the boisterous Irish sea, I was reminded of my first experience of seasickness on a P...